Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

A guy watches TMJBtv on YouTube. He then shoots himself.

What do you call a blonde doctor? Doctor

Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Except for the cases when you die...then you are dead.

Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

say it ten times fast: oh

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got run over on the way there.

What do you get when you take a bag of chips and divide it by 5? a Nike store worker's meal

i tell you whats funny......... what? a fat sudanese man

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body in an accident? He bled to death.

How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

Whats red and looks like a bucket? -a red bucket Whats blue and looks like a bucket? -a red bucket disguised as a blue bucket

What did Hitler say to Obama Nothing because Hitler is dead.

Why did the boy fall out of his seat? He was being strangled with a piano wire.

Why did Tiger look in the toilet? It doesn't matter, he didn't find anything.

Her tits are so big that they would provide adequate nourishment for any future offspring.

Why did the cat die? To get to the other side

a man walks into a bar and a horsefly eats him

Your mom is soo fat that when God said "let there be light" he had to ask her to move

I haven't had sex for about 2 years, 10 months, 20 days and 4 minutes. It doesn't bother me though.

roses are red violets are blue I have a knife stand by the door

Logan's gay

Q: Why is Rosie odonell fat? A: Because you are sexual attracted to small children.

What is the difference between a dead baby and a mustang? I dont have a mustang in my garage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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