Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q: What's the difference between a grasshopper and pencil? A: Lots

thumb_up thumb_down -24

how many blondies were at the mall? none they were too busy trying to find the sun.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting shot in the knee several times and bleeding to a slow and painful death.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's green and has wheels? The Holocaust. I lied about everything.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

so a black guy goes to a hot dog eating contest how many does he eat? enough to win.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's worst than missing a doctors appointment? Having AIDS and missng out on getting a cure that could have gotten rid of your disease.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How can you tell the difference between a black man and a white man? Quite easily actually.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

The bartender says "We don't serve time travellers here". Two time travellers walk into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How do you get a one-armed man out of a tree? you wave.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Knock Knock Who's There? Ted. Oh, Hey Ted.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

You might be a redneck if you're from a rural area and behave as such.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What is worse than the holocaust Nothing it was fine with the Jews in camps burning and dying

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Eating food: Ugh disgusting! Taking a dump later: THIS IS DELICIOUS! Man, you are doing it wrong... Waterworld was a pretty dry movie, I mean when are they gonna start making movies with a bit of wet humor for a change? SERIOUSLY BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY I AM NOT SERIOUS!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did the woman say just before she was stabbed eleven times in the chest thus killing her? Nothing, she had been gagged.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

yo momma is so stupid, she probably in in the bottom 1% of her age group

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

He is outside, running for it, Erron, seriously who is We? I thought you where an author.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

On Friday the 13th,My cat turned into a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q:So there's a black guy and a mexican sitting in a car...who's driving? A: The Cop

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was holding hands with the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It saw a banana. Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? It slipped. Why did the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? It thought this was all a game. Why did the sixth monkey commit suicide? All his friends were gone.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why was Joseph Kony at a primary school ? It was 3 o'clock and his children had just finished a long hard day learning to read and right and it was his turn to pick them up after him and misses Kony developed a schedule one late night after the odd glass of wine or two.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Knock Knock... Who's there? The FBI, you're going to jail. Really? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops