I'm on a seafood diet. It consists of prawns and tuna.

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knock knock who's there? the chicken i just crossed the road to offer you this token of appreciation for helping me screw in a lightbulb

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Q:Why did Hitler lose World War II? A:His "gas" bill.

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Why black people are so good at football? Because they have white feet.

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What did the psychopath say to the firefighter? Can you lend me a few bucks? My clothes are dirty and I need to go to the launromat.

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bill goes to the room.. why? to fing a broom riddle boz full of burtiouse.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was holding hands with the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It saw a banana. Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? It slipped. Why did the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? It thought this was all a game. Why did the sixth monkey commit suicide? All his friends were gone.

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I wumbo, you wumbo, he she me,.WUMBO!

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Why did the room go dark? Somebody turned the lights off

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"Bitches are fake, talk shit get hit!". False, female dogs cannot speak in the tongues of humans, and if they could I am sure excrement would not come from their mouths.

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What did the elderly lady say to the man? You still have not repaid my services

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Leaves are green, You should know all this by now...

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roses are red violets are blue my dick is long longer then you

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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DEATH.

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Holy sh** a talking muffin!!!

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What's the answer to all your problems The answer

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A: knock knock A: knock knock knock... A: door bell

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I have a riddle. What's black and white and red all over? Nothing. That's impossible.

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What is worse than finding an apple in you worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

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Roses are red Violets are blue We decapitated some little children Now I'm in jail too.

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-What did the policeman say to the boy? -Hello.

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What has eyes but can't see? Helen Keller. What has ears but can't hear? A field of corn.

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Why did the tomato turn red? The salad pulled out a gun.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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