What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a nest of worms in your apple.

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whats the best thing about life? whatever the best thing about life happens to be!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

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Why did the lady have a birthmark on her leg? Because she came out of her mother's leg.

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Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

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Why was the kid crying? Cause he had a frog stapled to his face.

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I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

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K

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What's white and looks like paper? Paper.

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What does a man say to his annoying friend? Please stop annoying me now.

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why did the cow go to the theater? to see the new movies pick one and have a good time.

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Why did little Lynn fall of her bike? Because she has no legs.

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What did the mother say to her son? Nothing, she was dead.

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A man buys a prius

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Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was tired of working for the man.

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A little boy who was sleeping in his parents' bed woke up in the middle of the night only to discover his mother performing fellatio on his father. "Mommy, mommy," he said . . . except he didn't -- he said nothing, and the incident troubled him for many years.

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Why does Renee suck at tetris Because she has cancer.

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? She had no arms and legs Knock knock Who's there? Not Lucy

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? i know how to make a pizza

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What's Black,White and red all over? A black person with a skin disease on her period.

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Hahahahaha your nan had HIV and died.lol

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Q: what's the difference between a young, geeky kid living in Wisconsin's basketball and Yao Ming's basketball? A: young, geeky kids cannot live in Wisconsin's basketball. Wisconsin is a state, and states cannot own objects because they aren't sentient beings. And Yao Ming's basketball... is just a regular basketball that happens to be owned by Yao Ming.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Hatch. Hatch who? God bless you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops