What do you call Jake Morter? Jake Morter

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What would you do for a Klondike Bar? I would probably spend somewhere under 3 dollars at a store, but only if somebody else drives me. I really don't want to drive, not in this gas shortage. You know what...forget it, Klondike Bars make my teeth hurt due to my sensitive teeth problem. I know I should get that sensitive teeth tooth paste, but I always forget when at the store.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q. What's better then a baby in a microwave? A. What the hell is wrong with you? Did your parents not love you enough when you were born? Everything is worse then a baby in a microwave! Besides the felony charges it is extremely wrong! Your going to hell.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call an Arab driving a Plane? A Pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

??????????? ??????????????? "Hello, idiot teacher! You eat milk."

thumb_up thumb_down +22

69

thumb_up thumb_down +22

John went to the shop to purchase a can of coca cola. He left the shop with a can of coca cola.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what do you call a mexican in a coffee shop? a customer and/or worker in the coffee shop.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

-Knock knock! -Who's there? -Pizza. That'll be 20 bucks. -Here you go. -Thank you.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Two guys walk into a bar. Whoops did I say bar? I meant Hiroshima 1945. They got radiation poisoning and died slow painful deaths.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How did the chicken know where he was going? He had a map.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Misner is a twat.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did Emily fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Emily.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man walks into a bar. He has suffered from a concussion and is now in the emergency room.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

The Blonde Gets 100 % On Her Math Test

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what did little johnny scream at the xbox after he lost a game? god what the hell! Muskcrat143 i told u to cover my back when i had my predator missile! now my covers blown and i lost my killstreak! god u suck so much and Hippo099 why didn't u kill them before they got a killstreak like wtf!!! i told u to use ur semtex cause i had a claymore set down jeez u guys suck i'm leaving.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's pink and when you press a button it turns red? A baby in a blender. What's pink and when you hit it against the wall sounds metallic? A baby with two forks stuck in its eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

There is a blonde, a redhead, and a brunnette stuck on a deserted island. the redhead gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk the 100 miles back to shore. she begins swimming, gets 10 miles out, gets tired, and drowns. the brunnette gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk it too. she gets 50 miles, gets tired, and drowns. The blonde decides to escape as well. she is able to swim 98 miles, gets tired, and swims back.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

HOLY SHIT BITCH!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

justin bieber: ask me if im a boy are you a boy? no.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A chicken crosses the road and goes into a bar and recites the following poem: Roses are red Violets are blue Knock Knock Who's there? Sugar is sweet Sugar is sweet who? And so are you. The bartender was confused considering she's a blonde. A genie appears and says to the Mexican he'll grant him 3 wishes. The black guy, the white guy, and the jew were at the bar also. The priest was also drinking. They all had a great time.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a blue bucket? A blue bucket. What do you call a red bucket? A blue bucket in disguise.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How many Ringmasters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They tell the clowns to do it

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops