A man walks into a bar... has a beer then leaves to his beautiful wife and his 2 children

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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Why did Sally fall of the swing? Breaking news! An 18 wheeler has gone loose and hit a playground damaging a swing, 1 fatality and 16 children injured 5 in critical condition

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Whats brown, large, thick, and sticky? a stick

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A black man, a white man, and a group of Jews were all walking down the street. They got hit by a bus.

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Your mama so fat That she suffers from heart disease

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? No. Oh don't worry then.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was trying to kill himself in the fastest and easiest way due to his drinking problems, which in the first place separated him him from his wife, who is fighting with him in court for custody of there only child ,Steven. He can not even pay the rent on his apartment or hold a job to pay child support..he is also in debt.

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A man attempts to rob a bank. The police are called and the robber is arrested for attempted robbery.

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roses are red and violets are blue and i was going to write something that rimes but that is not funny here.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesnt scream when you put it in the oven!

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What do you do when you say shut up to someone and they say make me? Rip out their vocal cords.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Not Harry Styles! - Louis

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This is my favorite antijoke.

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What did the tide say to the sea?ANSWER-- Long time no sea. LOL Issaiah from OHIO yolo

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knock knock? who's there? a guy..... so the man open's the door and the guy clutching a knife stabs repeatedly at his chest killing him and drags his body down into his cellar locking him away from the open world. by Mad James

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what can you say about a midget dressed as a clown? he had a terrible childhood.

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Roses are Red, violets are blue,love can not tell how much I love you!!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

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Why did the woman spend all her time in the kitchen? For fear of her abusive husband.

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What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

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wetly sucks dick just like teh boowb

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go F*** yourself

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? I don't know but you're a sick person even thinking about it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops