Roses were red Violets were blue Until the Fire nation attacked Now it's all black

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Why is it a shame if a kid gets run over by a car? I like the newspaper headlines about stabbings better.

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Wishing to teach his donkey not to eat, a pedant did not offer him any food. When the donkey died of hunger, he said: ‘I’ve had a great loss. Just when he had learned not to eat, he died.

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what did John do to make the cold weather a little less irritating? well, being a homeless man, John did..... nothing.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend "I know. You need to quit gnawing when you're giving me a blow job."

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Why couldn't Austin eat his noodles? He was a horse, and horses don't have hands, silly goose!

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What did the black guy say when he failed his math test? Crap, I failed my math test!

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What did the Johhny say to the black man when he saw him buying a watermelon? Nothing, Johnny is mute.

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Why did the car drink Slurpies? I don't know. Why? Doorknob. Carl was unsure on what his friend, Frank meant when he told his joke, but then again who IS sure? Frank is the only one who truly knows what happened that day on August 13th 2010 when his mother came over for a surprise visit to her son's house just as Frank was heading out the door about to get in his truck and buy groceries, unaware that his mother was standing outside and bending over to ring the door bell not to expect Frank opening the door with his quick and violent actions thus hitting his mother in the face as the door swung open. Frank hadn't known his mother was at his house nor even remembered him but there she was, past out bleeding to death on his front lawn. It was Frank's fault that day, when his mother past away and reason why Frank hides his anger through his jokes. If only he hadn't opened that door he tells himself every night. Now he's cursed himself with his odd humour of using doorknobs as punchlines to hide his grief of his loss. And with that, Carl replies; Ummm.... I don't get it.

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How did Goku save his home planet? He didn't.

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Velcro. What a rip off.

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what did the African kid get for his birthday AIDS

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What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

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Why did the little boy chase after his ball? Because it rolled away

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Red sky in the morning, Shepard's warning. Red sky at night, Shepard's Fulcrum.

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What's Green and flies? Super Grapes cousin Super Grape

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Why did the football player walk so funny? He went to Penn State!

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What is big, white, and heavy ? A fridge

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What did the woman get for her 18th birthday? Stabbed to death.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, Gee, I wish I could partake in even the first two lines of this stanza, but alas, I have colourblindness.

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I can count to potato.

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Gandalf and Dumbledore had a son, her name wasn't.

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charlie sheen

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Yo momma so fat her pancreas doesn't work anymore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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