- Anti Joke

what did the boy with no hands get for christmas Gloves!!! just kidding i dont know he hasnt opened the box yet

Who is best known for causing the Mt. St. Helens Eruption, The World Series Earthquake, and The Asian Tsunami in 2004? According to insurance companies, God.

Roses are red, violets are blue, This is false, Violets are purple.

What do you call a muslim in an airport? A muslim going on vacation you racist bastard.

Guess what your birth certificate really is. An apology letter from the condom factory.

What did the over confident jack-ass say to the hot girl, You'll do.

whats small and sexually confused? YOu

how do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

I remember my days you know in the army, agfanifuckingstan, got dirty water, then spent a week shitting... Anyway, I was holding a grenade right? And then two of them came around and I was like "here come good boy! GOOOD BOY! Catch the ball!" And then I pulled the pin and threw it. Aww shut up, you are all like "YOU SOLDIER KILL PUPPIES!" NO THOSE WHERE KIDS! And they would have been like 15 today and been killing your men today! YOU ARE SO FUCKING WELCOME!

I went to work Got paid, Then came home.

What did the Holocaust survivor say when asked about their memories in the deathcamps? A: I'd rather not think about it.

What do you call a naked couple? Horny.

Does Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? No, it's a scam.

Why couldnt the woman wear her new necklace? She was decapitated

What do you call a fly without wings? Injured and left for dead.

An English ship lands in the New World and offers to trade with the natives. The ship actually carried foreign diseases that the natives had no immunity to, and they all died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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What did the waitress do when the man asked for pizza? She ran away

How does Ron Weasley greet Harry in the morning? Mornin' Horry, how did ghe' sleep?

Hitler wasn't that bad... He DID kill Hitler.

Why did little Suzy fall of the Swing? Someone threw a fridge at her.

three jews walk into a bar. then a bear mauls them.

Have you ever seen the episode of the powerpuff girls where they save the day?

God. God.

What's the difference between a park bench and a hobo? The park bench can support a family