Why couldn't the little girl see in the dark? She had no eyes.

What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Why wasn't Steve paying attention in class? Because he was dead.

Why did the boy fail his midterm? he didnt study.

What do grizzly bears and people have in common? Neither can survive in outer space, due to depressurization, lack of oxygen, and absence of basic survival needs.

Little Justin's bike has a flat tire has a flat tire. He asks his dad to inflate it. "Sure Justin I can fix that for you." Said his father. But he overinflates the tire, causing the tire to explode and ignite the chemicals. The house burns to the ground, killing Justin and his parents. The fire then spreads and the hole city burns. 50,000 people die.

what has small feet? a human being with a tiny proximity of feet matter.

What do you call a man who has been run over by a car? An Ambulance

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Stop procrastinating.

3 men walk into a bank. They rob the bank and kil 13 hostages.

yo mama so fat that when she jumped on her tempurpedic mattress the wine did spill

whats wrose than slipping on a banana? Getting Shot in the face.

How do you get a baby to start crying? Drop a brick on it. How do you get it to stop crying? Drop two bricks on it.

How many apples come from trees? None, not a single one of em'

Two guys walk into a bar. The Third ones a duck

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a car? I don't have a car in my garage.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Im a Jew, Fart yourself.

Q: What's red and bad for your teeth A: A brick

Why did thw chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

what's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings what's worse than 2 bee stings? the Holocaust. what's worse than the holocaust? 3 bee stings

How many baby's does it take to paint a wall Depends on how hard you throw them

Yo momma so old that she should be concerned about mesothelioma and asbestoses, as she may have lived during a period of increased asbestos use. She may also be at risk of osteoporosis and should take vitamin supplements daily to improve her rapidly deteriorating health.

Why didn't the oven turn on? Because nothing turned it on.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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