What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? A basketball.

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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Why was't the Elephant allowed on the Airplane? He didn't have a boarding pass

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What is orange and smells like a jewish cat. Nothing

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What do you get when you cross Justin Bieber with a chicken? Most likely some kind of singing human-chicken monster, although given the little research done on cross-species splicing, this is a highly improbable circumstance.

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Why did the audience leave disappointed? Low budget and poor directing.

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Two guys walk into a bar. Whoops did I say bar? I meant Hiroshima 1945. They got radiation poisoning and died slow painful deaths.

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A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

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How do you make a telemarketer scream? Set him on fire.

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Why didn't Charlie Sheen lose? Because he's always winning.

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An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do.

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whats long, black, and smells like shit? a big turd

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How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her a question.

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what is blue and smells like fish? blue fish ;)

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I like colin but not as much as apple

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No.

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You ask a German how long it takes to go from Berlin to Amsterdam. He replies, ''About four hours by tank."

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why does the world spin? Chuck Norris says so

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I like touching my boobs

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There were a dog and a cat in a family house. The dog turned to the cat and said .. nothing because a dog can not speech the human language.

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A black guy walked in to a gas station, walked up to the counter and payed for his items with his debit card.

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Why did the chicken cross the street? K

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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