Why do fat people make such good slaves? They're too fat and lazy to escape. Unfortunately, if you want your slave to be fat, you actually have to feed it properly.

What is the longest sentence that a man knows? If it is used it in context, isn't round and the speaker attempts to quote the whole number - or at least all of it known to date, then any sentence involving the value of pi.

Why did sara fall out of the tree? -she had no arms.. Knock knock. -who's there? not sara.

Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am color-blind, I hate my life

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dieing in a hole.

What do you call a Rhino and a Lion having sex? Pointless, since they can't reproduce

What is Colder than a witch's tit? Not much. It was removed for biopsy and kept in the pathology freezer. At absolute zero.

Were can you find a bag of meth? A drug dealer

A tree falls over on an old woman. Mysteriously, the woman lifts the tree up and walks away. A man is amazed by this, so he goes and asks the woman how she managed to lift the whole tree. She tells the man that he is an idiot an walks away. Later inspecting the tree, he realizes it is a small sapling weighing no less than 10 pounds

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was shot.

your friend is so gay that he cuts of dicks as his part time job. and enjoys it.

What do you call a bear in an elevator?...A fire hazard.

Horse walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face. The horse unable to understand English shits on the floor and leaves

Roses are blue vilotets are yellow, obviously I don't know this rhyme so well u have aids and will die of cancer at the age of 25, and so will ur mom

If Chuck Norris has $5 and you have $5... that's $10.

You have 10 apples and 12 cabbages How many pizzas can you fit on the roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

So I saw a man trying to push a plane. I asked why. He told me to mind my own business and go get ebola. And that's why I left for Africa.

Wanna hear something half funny 34.5

What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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Bob: Whats the difference between a fish and a microwave? Steve: I don't know Bob: Daaaamn your dumb!

What's worse than having a mouth full of molars? A pole through your chest.

What happen? Idk...

what is worse than a joke? an anti-joke.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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