Why was the dog barking... Because billy fell down the well

Man is even more eager to copulate than a donkey – his purse is what restrains him

How do you distinguish between an unlabeled carton of milk and an unlabeled carton of cream without breaking the seals? You label them.

Q: how do you stop a baby's crying keeping you up at night A: pull out it's wind pipe

Roses are blue Violets are red Is that really What I just said?

Once upon a time, there were two brothers jumping on a bed. Q: The one stopped. Why? A: His brother fell off, cracked his head, started uncontrollably bleeding and died.

Why did the mathematician go to jail? Because he killed his wife.

why did winnie the pooh have his head in the toilet,? it was clogged.

Your mom is so fat that she turns "One Size Fits All" to "One Size Fits Most"

wHY DIDN'T THE HORSE FINISH COLLEGE? HIS GRANT RAN OUT AN HE COULDN'T GET ANOTHER STUDENT LOAN.

A Jew walked into Germany. He never walked back out.

sfdg

? The person who made that "joke" down there has no life ?

nice tits.

What did the framer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

There's two sausages in a pan.. One says "Wow it's hot in here" The other says... "agrhhh a talking sausage"

Why didn't my marriage work out? Because I married a tangerine.

What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A baseball, bat, and a glove.

What's worse than the holocaust? An open-minded black man.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? a bike

Koalas mum is a slut

why couldn't jimmy play on the swings at recess.. Because he's been dead for 5 years

what's the difference between a jew and a pizza? a jew is a member of a religion called Judaism, they're generally tall and have curly hair, however not in all situations is this true. They celebrate Chanukah and passover and many other holidays. Pizza is an italian dish, it's round, has red sauce and cheese on it and is pretty tasty.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...