why did the black man leave his home because there was a hurricane that would have killed him if he stayed.

Q: What's circlular and has two hands? A: A skinny person, i was kidding about the circular part!

What is brown and green and goes 100 mph? A tree falling down on your house.

A man walks into a bar wearing large and baggy pants. The bartender asks him, "Why the large, baggy pants?" The man replies, "Because they're comfortable."

Justin Bieber's voice sounds like Michael J. Fox playing a theramin.

three gay men were sitting in a hottub. a condom floats to the surface. why the hell were you watching them?

Doctor doctor, I feel like listening to good music. Looks like you need "The Cure" to help with this.

When life gives you lemons.... Don't eat them, because you're probable hallucinating, and you don't know where they came from.

A man finds an antique lamp at a garage sale. He takes it home and polishes it, and a majestic genie materializes. The genie thanks the man for freeing him from excruciating slavery, shakes his hand, and returns home to his overjoyed family.

you gay?

If you play The Binding of Isaac backwards, it's about a boy who summons Satan in hell and ascends multiple floors and eventually revives him mom by sucking in tears. He eventually becomes less of a monster until going back to his home and living hapily with his mother, completely forgetting anything had ever happened.

how many babies does it take to paint a house depends on how hard you throw em

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

A black duck walks into a bar. Duck: "I'll have a beer." Bartender: " How you paying for that?" Duck: "Put it on the tax payers."

why didnt the old man go to his sons birthday he died.........nah i lied he went went

whats a bike and rhymes with mike?

What did little Ben's mom give him for Christmas? Nothing. She died last month

what bounces and is blue all over? a blue bouncy ball

Why do fat people make such good slaves? They're too fat and lazy to escape. Unfortunately, if you want your slave to be fat, you actually have to feed it properly.

I want a lot of likes...do it you wont. i know you wont.

a young boy once lost his mind and then his parents weeped because their son had been decapatated in a horrible motorcycle accident caused by a drunk who had just killed his wife and children and was running from the cops....

What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The police officers involved were fired and sued by the family, ruining their lives. Months later they both committed suicide.

When an intellectual was told by someone, "Your beard is now coming in," he went to the rear entrance and waited for it. Another intellectual asked what he was doing. Once he heard the whole story, he said: "I'm not surprised that people say we lack common sense. How do you know that it's not coming in by the other gate?"

Ask me if im a truck. Are you a truck? Yes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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