Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't. Her head was stuck in the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a praying mantis at your door step? a Jehovah Witness

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red, violets are blue, I got Alzheimer's! ...... Who the hell are you?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why are anti jokes not funny.... Because they make sense.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

EVAN RAMSEY -CAD CLASS!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

knock knock whos there? i dont know arent you supposed to get the door?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a guitar with only one string? A guitar.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Which came first? The chicken? Or the egg? Whichever one was more sexually excited i guess.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man walks into me and I say: "WATCH IT PUNK!"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's worse than getting AIDS from your boyfriend? Getting AIDS from your brother.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Nowadays, aviation is the most secure means of conveyance in the world, but paragliding is not.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you find out if your son is ok? Ask him.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's more traumatising than watching your dad raping a man? Watching a man raping your dad.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is the difference between a brick and a ginger? The entirety of their chemical make up and physical appearance.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the girl get run over by a bus? The bus driver was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the girl fall of the swing? I hit her with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stapled to a donkey

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To go to work. And be sexually harassed. For 70 cents on the dollar.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock, Knock Who's there? The IRS, we're taking your house. This is a vacation notice, please be out of the property in 30 days. Have a nice day.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: why is halloween scary? A: because your there!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's a stupid joke on anti-joke? One that involves a random number with absolutely no meaning

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops