Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

Why did Susie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Susie.????

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff, Whats not pink and fluffy? Sexual assault.

What did the old man catch at a baseball game? Aids.

Who the heck do you think you are?! Ally...duh

Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

Why did Michael Jackson name his kid blanket? Because after years of drug abuse and sexual insecurity led to him thinking unrealistically during the birth of his children.

Knock knock Who's there? The Gestapo, time to go to Auschwitz.

Your mother's so fat.....When she gets on the scale, it tells her how much she weighs

the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

A dog says to a horse "Hey, why the long face?" the horse just looks at him.

Q: If you are debating whether to smoke marijuana, consider: what will your mother say when she finds your corpse? A: As a relatively harmless and non-addictive substance, Marijuana was most likely not the cause of my child’s death. It was probably AIDS.

There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

Person 1: 'Ask me if I'm a tree' Person 2: 'Are you a tree?' Person 1: 'No.'

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, Oh shit, my garden is on fire

How many Muslims does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

what do you call the man making meth in his basement? the police to stop inappropriate behavior from reaching the children of society.

Killing your friend as a joke.

Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

A guy walks into a bra. The woman screams and calls 991.

whats worse than a bee sting, two bee stings, whats worse than two bee stings, the holocaust, whats worse than the holocaust, tree bee stings...

Knock Knock Nobody Nobody who? Nobody, did you not hear what I just said.

what do you call a bird that is gay bird a gaybird

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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