roses are blue violets are red and just like you they're messed up in the head

thumb_up thumb_down -18

two men where hunting one man shot a deer and ate it, the other man shot the man who killed the deer and made human steaks. a day later he killed his family. and ate them with his dog. he then grabbed the deer that was left in his fridge and used it to make a fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

hey i just met you,but this is crazy, my name is kony and i just took your baby

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Two men walk into a bar. You would think at least one of them would've seen it.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did the lawyer say to the lawyer We are both lawyers

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q: whats worse that sucking at piano A: the world blowing up

thumb_up thumb_down -18

"Why isn't Bud capable of reading?" Bud is a stone "Why can't Peter drive?" Peter is a woman

thumb_up thumb_down -18

gggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did the dog say to the other dog? Ruff, hi, ruff ruff, we are both dogs ruff ruff, ruff ruff, ruff!!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did Pikachu say to Charmander? Nothing. Pokemon are fictional creatures, and thus, do not exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A rabbi and a nun walk into a bar. They grab a drink and really hit it off despite their differences. After a couple years of happy dating, the rabbi, Mark, preposes. Gloria, the nun, gladly accepts. After four months, Gloria is pregnant. She dies in childbirth. The child has many illneses and dies within a week. Mark commits suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

I accidentally solicited a prostitute today. I was driving in an iffy neighborhood and saw a woman on the sidewalk, so I stopped to ask if she could give me directions. She must have misheard me.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

death drives to the bus stop where 3 pensioners are waiting for a bus to london, and says GET IN THE VAN!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Is your refrigerator running? Yes Good. Enjoy your cold drinks.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his failing marriage.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

I wrote a funny joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

how do you save a black man ... u don't

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Man 1- What's red, black, and white all over? Man 2- What? Man 1- Half a penguin! Man 2 became seriously disturbed from this joke, as he saw the movie Happy Feet two days ago. He went to intense therapy and became mentally deranged.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Roses are blue, Violets are red, Wait, what? huh

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What does a fish say when it swims into a wall? Damn

thumb_up thumb_down -18

69

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Have you heard that joke about Helen Keller? No. Neither has she.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

?"i'm so turned on right now." - horny light bulb

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops