What does a black man do in the bathroom? He Dookies on bobby

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Two horses were discussing their racing records. The first said, "In my whole life I had won ten races." The second horse says, "Well, I've won twelve of those!" A greyhound trotting by chimes in, "Not bragging guys, but in my career, I've won twenty!" "Unbelievable!" exclaimed both horses. "It's a talking dog!"

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A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

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A white man on his way to happens to sit next to a black man the following conversation involves a democrat and a repuplican arguing about obama's current presidentcy and the wallstreet journal the two do not agree on both sujects and part ways...the white man is later brutally murdered in his own house infront of white and children in an unrelated incident. We should all help to stop violence in our local nieghborhoods.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Well, you should, if only for the cultural experience.

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your mother is so fat that she got brain damaged from cardiac arrest and now needs medical care for the rest of her life.

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There is a blonde, Santa and Jesus. Someone throws a million dollars on the ground who picks it up? Me because I shot them

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why did the boy have to go to the dentist he was hit by a brick

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A rooster lays an egg on the tip of a roof. Which side does it fall to? Roosters don't lay eggs

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I used to be able to walk, but then I took an arrow to the knee. It tore my acl and shattered my kneecap.

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It's Christmas in Iraq. Merry Christmas

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Did you hear about the guy who got his entire LEFT side ripped off? He's dead.

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Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was tired of working for the man.

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God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

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What did the limp dick say to the vagina? Is that rash contagious?

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If Selfish Sam has twelve cookies and Tricky Todd asks for three then how many cookies does sam have left? Twelve. Remember he's selfish

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. It was hanging on a clothes line he didn't see.

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What did you say? I'm blind. (Did not write this meaning to be offensive)

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How many Caucasian American males does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Anywhere from 2-8, depending on the size of the vehicle.

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Why din't Santa come to Timmy's house? Timmy died 6 months ago. :(

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What did the comedian say when he fell off the cliff? Nothing; dead beings are incapable of performing actions.

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What is the biggest lie in the world? I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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What happened to Kurt Cobain? He committed suicide. He shot himself in the head with a shotgun and then he died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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