Q: What did one water bottle say to another water bottle? A: Nothing. Water bottles are inanimate objects and are thus unable to communicate.

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Why does the same anti-jokes pop up over and over again? Because people have no creativity.

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What did the girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was homeless and dead.

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Alan: My Grandfather was in the SS and has a leather jacket made jews he killed. Me: Really? Alan: No, i'm korean. My grandfather wouldnt be allowed into the SS.

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why did the mushroom go to the party? because he`s a fungi

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Person 1: Why does food from Subway taste so good? Person 2: I don't know, why? Person 1: Because their ingredients are fresh. Person 2: Um, OK? Person 1: Yeah, it's all under 18. Person 2: Shit...

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Say this really fast. Ice Bank Mice Elf It'll take a while for dumbasses to understand.

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hi mom

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hi

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Whats better than 7 babies tied to 1 tree 1 baby tied to 7 trees

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Knock Knock. Whos there? I am the danger! Danger who? I AM THE ONE WHO KNOCKS!

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Why did the two blondes decide to ride in one car? Because it's more environmentally friendly than taking two cars.

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

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Why did Samuel drive his car into a tree? Because the tree was being a total jerk, blocking the road.

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

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Robocop and T-800 argue over who can run the fastest, Robocop claims he is the fastest, while T-800 says that he is the fastest. To settle things once and for all, they start a race. At first T-800 seems to be leading Then the T-800 is leading by a great distance. moments later the T-800 has a huge lead. But then suddenly, without any warning, the race shifts! T-800 is now leading only by a great distance! Yet in a amazing, and completely unexpected plot-twist. T-800 wins! Moral: :O

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women sports....

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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asdf

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Kumquats Daffodils Alka-Seltzer Serendipity Dewey Decimal System Buccaneer Avuncular Pantaloons Weasels Alligator Chewbacca Sasquatch

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How do you get a person to stop talking to you? Ask nicely to please be quiet and let me talk.

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Oh no my baby is dead. Ha.

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Doctor: Knock knock. Patient: Whose there? Doctor: Interrupting doctor. Patient: Interrupting doc... Doctor: Your son has AIDS and will die soon.

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What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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