Q: What's worse than stepping a LEGO in the middle of the night? A: A landmine

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A kid walks into a bar and the bartender yells, "Get Out!"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why was Dr Who unable to travel back in time using the TARDIS? Because it's just a television prop. It isn't a real time machine.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why does it take women to cum slower than men? Who cares

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you stop a group of black guys from fighting? go over to them and ask them politely to stop.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Two Gay Men Walk Into a Bar, Not Just Any Bar...... a Sports Bar and Enjoy a nice cold Beer with their Heterosexual friends while watching the super bowl. They both go in the back room, where it is dark, together........ and they call for the manager to find out where the chef is so they can tie him down..... and smother him....... in questions concerning the size of his....... buffalo wings stop judging people you ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

True or False : it would not cause a public disturbence to express your P0rnagraphy to the public??? true. P0rnagraphy is the freedom of speech and ability to express oneself

thumb_up thumb_down +4

In Pokemon, why are bug types super effective against dark types? Because Ebola affected a lot in Africa.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Good afternoon.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the boy cry when he got a new puppy? Because he had anal seepage coming out his ass

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Two octopuses are swimming in the ocean. Suddenly a scuba diver spots one of the octopus. The octopus looks at the human and swims away.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did the chicken cross the road? to try and stop the rapist from sodomizing his young child but his atempts were futile as the rapist shot him and used his blood as lubricant when he skull-raped his dying wife

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Someone stopped playing Skyrim.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Whats's the similarities between an apple and a cat? They both have legs except for the apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I remember my days you know in the army, agfanifuckingstan, got dirty water, then spent a week shitting... Anyway, I was holding a grenade right? And then two of them came around and I was like "here come good boy! GOOOD BOY! Catch the ball!" And then I pulled the pin and threw it. Aww shut up, you are all like "YOU SOLDIER KILL PUPPIES!" NO THOSE WHERE KIDS! And they would have been like 15 today and been killing your men today! YOU ARE SO FUCKING WELCOME!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Me: How can you tell if somebody's a Nazi? Friend: How? Me: Their killing people in a ghetto. Friend: My friend was shot in a ghetto. Me: So, does that make him a Jew? Friend: No, he was just killed in a big ass oven.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's worse than public speaking? Public masterbation. *Spelled it wrong purposly to bypass the filter*

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's white, wet, and sticky? A tissue that I just blew my nose with.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Have you seen Helen Keller's house? Well, It's an old style ranch home in a respectable neighborhood.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Well thats a stupid question, just one.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a banana? A banana.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's a black mans favorite thing to do Depends on that particular mans likes and interests

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: Why do circles make such good friends? A: They don't. They're shapes and there cannot have friends

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops