What's worse, a dead baby or an abortion? A dead baby on a bayonet

A squirrel and an owl are sitting in a tree. The squirrel turns to the owl and says nothing, because it is a squirrel and squirrels can't talk. The owl turns to the squirrel and eats it, because it is a bird of prey.

Q; What's the new slogan for the TSA? We handle more junk than EBay.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

I'm Stephen Hawking, and I'm a PC. I can't walk or talk, and I'm a Stephen Hawkings

one day a white guy was in detroit. it was very strange. nothing happened

What's brown and ryhmes with snoop? Dr. Dre

Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Why did the women cross the road? I dont know.. why? no clue.. why was she out of the kitchen

The WNBA is on the cooking channel

like most people my age. im 27

--- ___________________--- Can you tell what it is? Yes... Then what is it? Its a blanket,duh! ......

whats black and white? a zebra

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You shove her off the bed

What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

3 men walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks. Thumbs up if you get it.

why did the grinch steal christmas? The grinch had a rough childhood. he had an abusive father and a crack cocaine addicted mother, and as a result, the grinch never got a christmas of his own. The grinch steals the happiness of christmas from the who's becuase his horrible childhood has caused him to take his anger out on everyone around him, because the grinch believes that this will make up for his depressing childhoofd

I'M JOSH BROWN!!!!!

How do you get a dog and a baby mixed up? You stir your chili.

A young blonde walks into a bar and orders a shot of tequila. After about a few minutes she spots this very ugly man with one leg. The man just so happens to sit right next to her and orders a drink. The man reeks of cockroaches and he looks like a homeless man that hasn't bathed in months. They never talk and the blonde goes home.

How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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