why did the onion fall out of the bag? ...there was a hole in the bag so the onion fell out

why did the mexican cross the road? to get to the lawn mowing shop becuase his wife has breast cancer, and he cant pay the bills sitting on his butt and getting a check from the government every month

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

There were 3 guys named Sean, Ryan, and Eye. They were best friends. However, things escalated when Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend and Ryan found out. Ryan felt he had to tell Sean that Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend. Ryan went up to Sean and said "Dude, Eye slept with your girlfriend!" Then Sean shot Ryan in the head before Ryan realized what he had said. Game Over

What's the difference between a ginger and a brick? Bricks get laid

Your mom is so stupid, she thought the square root of pie was 3.14156

What's the deal with airplane food? Why don't they serve it as a complimentary part of the flight anymore?

so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: In order to avoid being mauled by a coyote.

What did the Dark Knight say to the Policeman? I'm Batman

A ginger kid and his 5 friends walk into a bar

did you know why people keep saying "you know...you know..." in their conversation? well i don't know

How do you please a black person? Shower him with love and affection.

What do you call a mexican with a broom in his hand? a man who likes to keep his office at his own company clean

A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

This is an anti joke

Womens rights

Why did they monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

Why couldnt the dog bark? The dog didnt exist.

what's the difference between a black man and a bench? the bench is an inanimate object

Roses are red, violets are red, Tulips are red, bushes are red.... WTF MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE.

Whats 2+1? 2.

where are the maternaty clothing in walmart???? The C section

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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