Why did susie fall off the swing? Because an arrow penetrated her head.

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Why did the scientist go to the hospital? because he was experimenting with dangerous chemicals, and they exploded in his unsuspecting face. He doesn't have skin now.

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Q )Why did the black man shoot the white man? A )The black man had been walking home from his weekly gospel service at the local church when suddenly the criminal had stopped him in his tracks. In a desperate attempt to save himself he seized the gun from the white man and shot him in the leg in order to defend himself. He survived.

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Where is the best place to hold a bridal shower? The Kitchen

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Q: Why couldn't the man get laid? A: Women were afraid of his 7 testes and 4 penises.

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Q: Why did the kid drop his icecream cone? A: Because he couldn't hold it he lost his arms in a car accident.

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How do you kill a blonde? Choke her.

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Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear Fuzzy wuzzy had no hair Fuzzy wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy, was he? No, because he had cancer.

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A black man walks into a sporting goods store and pulls out a gun! Then he returns it and leaves.

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Why was the black man driving a plane? because he was a pilot, you racist.

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What Is big, round, and looks like gaben. Gaben!

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? I got feathers stuck in my cars grill

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Knock knock, "Whos there" a business man who wants to sell you things that you don't need "Oh, go away"

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I like pie. I know you do too.

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whats polish and black a polish black person

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What's purple and smells like crap? Crap. I lied about the purple

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Want to hear the World's shortest joke? Peace. [L]

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A chicken walks into a barn.

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Q: What's the hardest part about throwing a baby down the stairs? A: My dick.

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Q: What do you call someone who cant swim? A: A person that cant swim.

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So two guys walk into a bar and the third one ducks

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How do I want to die? From Chuck Norris killing me, that would be an honor.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The mailman! The mailman who? *opens door* Just kidding, I'm actually an axe-murderer!

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What is the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One you can smash with a hammer and the other is just a watermelon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops