Why does the Gay guy have a bell on his bike? Because its the only way his blind dog can follow him.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did james say on his bitrhday? There was no birthday because he was aborted but he said ''crunch'' anyway

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why didn't the boy want his dinner? Because it was a bowl of vomit.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why can't a dinosaur clap its hands? Dinosaurs are extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

whats black and white and red all over????? a zebra who got shot

thumb_up thumb_down +4

i killed a blind guy when he wasnt looking

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the girl fall off of her highchair? Her father threw an axe at her.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red, Violets at blue. My mind is twisted, Bend over bitch your about to get fisted.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the pregnant teen get for Christmas? A miscarriage

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Question: How did the little girl die Answer: cancer and AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why was the black guy that was smoking weed in his car not sent to jail? when the cop pulled him over he thought he was black the way he was dancing but turned out to be white but that just looked black when hes dancing.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A recently widowed blond was on her way to an appointment with her attractive physician, when she realized that she was almost out of gas, so she stopped to refuel at a station near his office.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Jake: When was war of 1812? Harry: 1812 Jake: Oh.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is yellow, has wheels, and lays on it's back? A school bus after a traffic accident

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Know what's funnier than the holocaust? Almost everything i can possibly imagine. The holocaust was a terrible case of mass extermination due solely to naxis racist views

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What kind of words did the terrorist say on his date? His last ones.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why shouldn't you drink and drive? You might spill your beer

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the kid trip over the rock? Because he was diagnosed with serious autism, and might die soon.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the tortoise cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A woman wears a dress.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what did the policeman say to an armed robber? you can go, as long as you don't hurt my doughnuts

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did Kermit the frog say at Jim Henson's funeral? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops