What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the girl buy the watermelon? To eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? I really hate poultry related jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Johnny Manziel is the best quarter ever (this isn't a joke just a true statement)

thumb_up thumb_down -8

There's a mexican and african american in a car. Who's driving? A cop.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A black man is seen next to a dead man. Who do you call? The ambulance.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the man think of when he saw a squadron of military bombers flying over his home? The football game is about to start

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why are fish bad at basketball? Because they're afraid of the net...

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Three Arabian men are on a plane, they stand up, and shout BOMB, BOMB, BOMB! All three have Tourettes.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q:Wats worse then cutting ur lawn A: diarea on a sunday morning

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's worse than dividing by zero? Chuck Norris dividing your face!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How many gay men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. He was happy to do it.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what's black, white, and red all over? A nun in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you stop a drunk driver? With a minivan and family of four.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

1

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the woman fall off her bike? She got hit by a car door

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Stop with the 9/11 jokes guys. They're just plane stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

so an apple walks into a bar... I'm terrible at making jokes...

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the little boy have gum on his shoe? Because he stepped on it

thumb_up thumb_down -10

There's 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and muscular guy. 7 days later, the fat guy receives an invitation to the zoo. It turns he got a new job and his friends was so proud.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops