How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them

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How do you make a suicide jumper not jump? Shoot him instead.

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how many blondies were at the mall? none they were too busy trying to find the sun.

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Koalas mum is a slut

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Yo momma's so stupid she comes up in a lot of jokes titled "yo momma jokes"

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Dave:Hi Mark:Hi

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Religionh

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What's green and has wheels? The Holocaust. I lied about everything.

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Kyle grund parker coffey

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What happened to the plumber payed in gum? His family left him because he was irresponsible with his business

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why couldn't the little boy sleep? he was being tortured.

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TIMMY

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How did poor Miss Suzy get her poor little baby to stop crying? She cut off its head, burned its body, and sacrificed its ashes in a bizarre Satanic ritual that involved having sex with a heifer. (Miss Suzy was a Satanist priestess.)

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Why was the Jew sad Because it was Christmas.

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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Violets are blue, Roses are red. The sentence before was completely irrelevant, but I needed something to say before I tell you, Your family's been murdered by the KKK.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? I don't know, you should check the zoo's surveillance camera.

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What is long and painful? It's a sword, get your mind out of the gutter.

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I also wanted to write a joke but I forgot it so here I am. Minecraft rocks and everyone who says otherwise is a noob

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why was the fat man excercizing? because he was a fatass and no one liked him

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How do you sneak Jews across the border? In an ashtray.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 20 years later he would gamble away his life savings and then go onto live a lonely and unfulfilled life.

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hello there i am a male from the small town of balamory and i have just found a very large oblong with an acute right angle strongly attached to the left hand side........do you think i should hand it to the new york extra torestial services ?

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Why did the skeleton not go to the party? Because without the aid of various ligaments and muscles that would be attached to the average human being's skeleton, he was not able to move himself so much as an inch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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