*Walk Into The Bakery* "Excuse me, sir. How much does the challah cost (holocaust)?

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Roses are red Violets are blue Its 2 in the morning Go the f+%& to sleep.

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What's worst than missing a doctors appointment? Having AIDS and missng out on getting a cure that could have gotten rid of your disease.

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A Priest, a Rabbi and an Imam were having dinner together at a local restaurant. Which caused a group of Republicans sitting nearby to ask for another table.

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What is more black than a Nigerian marathon runner? The night sky

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One day a man walked into a wall

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Q. What's a pirate's favorite type of movie? A. It depends on the individual pirate, although most modern-day pirates are from third world countries like Somalia and so are too poor to be able to watch many movies. Classical pirates like those depicted in Treasure Island or Pirates of the Carribean are, of course, from a period of history before movies had been invented, so couldn't possibly have had a favorite.

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a monk are standing near a cliff. They say that they are of the best religion. The priest jumps off the cliff and says "God save me", he dies. The rabbi says "Allah save me", he dies. The monk says "Buddha save me" he is saved, in relief he says "Oh thank God" he dies

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Why did Jimmy eat the apple? Because he was obese and needed to eat healthy because his doctor suggested it.

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God said onto john "come forth and receive eternal life" john came fifth and received a toaster.

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Why can't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? Because it takes years of hard training to accomplish such a remarkable feat.

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How do you get 100 Africans in a phone box? Throw a can of beans in there.

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*see an orphan* Knock knock Whos there Not you parents ...

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A white guy, spanish guy, and a black guy jump off a roof. They were all killed on impact and their families will mourn their loss for years to come.

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How do you get Helen Keller to keep a secret? You politely ask her not to tell anyone.

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Heeeheeeerrrrrrrrrrr

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When life gives you lemonade, give life lemons and it'll be like WTF?!

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What was the blind man's favorite game? Marco Polo

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Me too.

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2 Penises

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What do you call a boomerang that wont come back? Broken.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her she is a burnette.

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A Russian Irish and American beat up on a Canadian. the only thing wrong with that is i forgot the , in between the races. but on the good side the Canadian was Justin Bieber

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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