why couldn't randy turn on his computer? randy is blind and had mistaken his refrigerator for his computer.

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If two blondes had a kid it would probably be a blonde because two recessive chromosomes have a higher chance of showing than one dominant gene.

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One day a boy asks his teacher what blue velvet is then the teacher says "we don't ask questions like that in my class go to principal's office now"so the boy goes to the principal's office and then the boy asks "what is blue velvet"then the principal says"no one says that in my school get out" so the boy goes home and asks his mom what is blue velvet then his mom says you don't say stuff like that in my house get out!so the boy see's the Mayer. So the boy asks the Mayer what blue velvet is then the Mayer says no one says that in my town get out of my town! So the boy see's a man and the boy goes to the man and the man asks what happend to you and the boy says well I got kicked out of school kicked out of my house and got thrown out of town just because i asked what blue velvet is! So the man tells the boy that there is a lady across the street. So the boy is in the road and then the boy gets ran over and dies. So the lesson here is look both ways before crossing a street

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Why are watermelons green? 9, because cows like to eat grass.

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why did jonathan not get any presents for the holiday?because it was the 4th of July

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A man walked into a bar. He got a head trauma and committed suicide.

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"Knock knock" "The doors open" "Oh, okay"

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

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A Jewish man gets on a train. He sits down and a hour and a half later he is dropped of at his proper destination.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Somebody pushed it.

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Q:whats big white and falls out of trees A:a refrigerator

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How do you approach a hot guy in the library? Very quietly.

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it was 3 am in the morning and i was stopped by 2 black men in an alley. we said hey to eachother and went along

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How do you get rid of an STD? You give it to someone else.

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Why did the black guy still have price tags on his clothes? He forgot to take them off.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

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Girl look at that body, girl look at that body, I got passion in my pants... Actually I lied, I got a penis and testicles in my pants, but I'm afraid to show it because people might think it's small, sorry

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Why doesn't my mom make dinner anymore? she died in a fire on my birthday.

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Q. Why did the man die? A. Natural Causes

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Jimmy is at a movie ? He's with a gay boy

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What do you call a fly without wings? Injured and left for dead.

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What did the jew do to his waiter? He explained how he had provided excellent service and left a very generous tip to applaud his efforts.

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why did annie fall of the swing? she had no arms.. knock knock who's there? not annie.

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Why did Bob throw butter out the window, Because he is mentally retarded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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