How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

A man walks inti a bar and asks for a drink, he shows the bartender his ID and is kicked out because the man is underaged.

Take sebastian deep into the woods and put him down quickly

knock, knock... no one replies and it becomes obvious that no one is in the house.

What was the energizer bunny arrested for? Rape.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, as I wasn't there, and frankly I wonder why a chicken was anywhere near a road anyway

Roses are red Violets are violet Jesus Christ how dumb can you get.

What's the difference between Christians and Jews? The Holocaust. The Holocaust is the difference.

women drivers>asian drivers>asian women drivers

How many tortoises does it take to change a light bulb? One. Just don't expect it to be done quick.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Roses are blue Violets are red This isn't humor The Hell's wrong with you?

Gustavo Andrade

What do you get when you fall in love? A guy with a pin to burst your bubble.

How do black people vote? They go to their polling place, register, then vote for their candidate on election day.

What's long, hard, and full of seamen? An ejaculating penis.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Not because she had no arms, but because she just had no hands.

Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

A man walks into a bar. He is knocked unconscious, and passers-by rush to his aid.

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

Why did labour not win the election in 2010? Because they are clearly shit.

What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

A man walks into a vagina. The man, expecting a holiday inn, is very confused, and later gets mauled by five bears, who mistook his scent for a fish.

What did Batman tell Robin before he got into the Batmobile? "Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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