Why did the blonde go to business school? She wanted to get into business, and decided that a business degree was a good place to begin.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, Oh shit, my garden is on fire

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What's the difference between a duck? A toothbrush, because a car only has four doors!

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Why did Hitler kill so many Jews? Because he didn't like them.

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Why did Shrek eat the onions? Anyone who has seen the Shrek films would know that Shrek never mentions anything about eating onions. In the first movie, Shrek and donkey have a conversation in which he compares himself to an onion, but the scene lasts maybe a minute and never again does Shrek mention onions in any way, shape, or form. For whatever reason, this one scene has turned onions into the strongest signature icon associated with Shrek.

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Whats small yellow and cant swim? A short bus full of autistic children.

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Knock knock? Who's there? A Jehovah's Witness. Oh. Knock knock? Who's there? Not me!

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knock knock whos there boo boo who? stop crying its only me! its not you, my mom has cancer, my dad was killed in a car accident, my pregnant wife has been murdered, and my uncle touches me.

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What did Tom get for his 5th Birthday ? Nothing, he died when he was 2 years old

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James' father died from being overweight. The next day in the mail, James received a coupon for Skinny's garcinia cambogia pills to help him lost weight. Simply put, it was not a good day for James.

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Why did the black man have lots of money. He studied hard at school and got into a good university. He dedicated 5 years of his life working relentlessly and getting his diploma in medicine then went on to work in a private hospital as head doctor and neuro surgeon. He was very successful in his specific field of medicine. That didn't work out so after quitting his job and realizing he had wasted over 7 years of his life achieving nothing but lose of interest in his career. He then bought a lottery ticket and won 8 million dollars.

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Why did the fireman die? For various reasons,one was because he was burnt alive.

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A man walks into a bar, ouch!

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other is a baby.

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How many Jew can you fit in a car? As many as the car seats comfortably.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic And so am I

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Why was the guy stupid? 'Cause he was!

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A blonde walked into a bar.

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Yo mamas so fat she is obese

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Bear walks into bar and says to eagle may I have a................... drink eagle says why the long pause hohahahohahahohaha

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What has legs but can't walk? A table...or a dog with four broken legs.

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What begins with "B" and ends with "N" that you never want to call your neighbor? a Black Person

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Me. Me Who? Me. Uh.

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What did God say when he saw the first black man? What a wonderful creation I have made.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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