Which came first? The chicken? Or the egg? Whichever one was more sexually excited i guess.

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Why does mcguigan get made fun of ? Because he is gay with Jack Walsh

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What's the difference between Donald Trump and a refrigerator? Open a refrigerator and you will find food, typically refrigerated food like milk, eggs, you know, stuff like that.... When you open Donald Trump you will be charged with murder.

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Why does Charlie Sheen do cocaine? Because his father was a poor role model and he's an unstable celebrity.

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Halt! Who goes there?! It is I, Prince Ali Ba Ba of Yo mamas house. To what do I owe this pleasure of your kindness? I come to you with gifts, relics, and spices. All these can be yours if the price is right. Surely there must be a mistake here. How do you go about by and by without a horse? Are you who you say you are? English mothafucka do you speak it?!!! What is this mothafucka do you speak of? Say what again, I dare you! I double dare you mothafucka say what one more goddddam time. Oh wait stop, hammer time...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I ASKED YOU FIRST!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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why can't timmy tie his shoes? Because timmy's an earth-worm

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have safe sex

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she wasn't a woman

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Why did the girl fall off of her highchair? Her father threw an axe at her.

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What did the blondes left leg say to her right leg? Nothing they haven't met yet.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's worse then falling up the stairs? Ketchup

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it does whatever the hell it wants to do!

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What do you call a cold chicken? A Raw Chicken.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I was diagnosed as criminally insane Wanna be my friend?

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Why couldn't the fireman get over the hill? Because he was dead.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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There is big difference between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse And helping your uncle jack off a horse

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Hey, did you see that episode of Glee last night? It was awesome! Especially that scene where they all sang. It wasn't as good as the previous ones, but I think the show it making a comeback.

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Why did the bird lose all of it's feathers? It got cancer.

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A man walks in front of a bus. The bus driver avoids the man but hits the boy eating ice cream.

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What do a dog and a fork have in common? They both have tails. Except for the fork.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops