What do you call a penguin that hangs around in playgrounds? A paedophile.

It's raining it's poring the old man died die to a sudden increase in blood pressure thus leading to a heart attack

When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

j

What's the ultimtate guerilla camoflauge at night time? Black people.

69.

What happened when the woman sent back the pair of shoes she bought on eBay? She obtained a refund from the seller under eBay's return policy.

Quarters look shiny, Brass beats Copper, Dish is better, So enjoy the hopper. DIrect TV, is forever alone. Kinda like you, when your on your phone!

What's got one leg and no eyes? A leg.

I'vegto a riddel for you;l Do siolve it. during the day... I look liek a snake By night?///////////////// What ams i? Rack your brains

What happen to the girl that received chocolate on Valentine's day? She had a allergic reaction.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Rhetorical question.

You tell me. I have amnesia.

A Priest, A Rabbi, and an Imam walk into a bar. They promptly sit down and have a friendly theological discussion.

Why did the blonde leave the lamp on while sleeping? Because it helps to see in case you need to get up in the middle of the night. YOU THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO SAY "BECAUSE THEY'RE A LIGHT SLEEPER!" MUAHAHAHAHAHA

knock, knock who's there owls owls who thats right owls who

69

How do you kill a black man? You drop a fridge on him.

What word starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? Fuck.

What's the same about a clown and a knife? They are both fun, except for the clown. I hate clowns.

Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. The mailman who? Anthrax.

What did the politician say to the bank robber? "Were both robbers"

Woman's Rights

An epileptic man attends a rave.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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