What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where did my tractor go.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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ajkswhfuilafhgkfdgbluft

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Where do fat girls go to eat doughnuts? Jenny Craig

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why did the girl have pink hair? because she died it purple, but it didn't work.

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What's been hit millions of times? A woman married to an abusive husband.

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Q: What did the psychopath dream about? A: An insane chimpanzee kicking his head off, or maybe something normal

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Why didn't the blonde finish her book? She died.

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Q-Jetski A-How is olive oil made?

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what sad about 4 mexican dieing in a car crash??? My car

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What is ET short for? Extra terrestrial

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I put children on a leash and store them under my bed. I feed them bird food and they drink eachothers urine.

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Rebecca Black and Justin Bieber get married.... Friends and family attend the wedding

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What is worse than a nuke exploding? Going to the hospital and finding out you have cancer and aids.

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how long is a chinese name. how long. yup.

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What happened to the convict on death row? He died

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You know what they say... Big feet Lawn-mower

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Why did the kids all eat their homework? Probably because they were starving to death and there was no other food source available.

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Why am I righting in english? Because this is an english site.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a registered sex offender

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Why were trash man's hands dirty? He got shot in the leg and desperately tried to get the bullet out with his hands and got blood all over them and ass he was running to the hospital he tripped into shit.

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Why was young Ferdinand sad? He had a very rough day. In the morning he woke up. To find a man in his room, and then the man raped him. Then, Ferdinand found out that his whole family was killed by an angry rat. Then, he realized his grandma took away all his Christmas presents and ate them. Then, the angry rat showed up and brutally murdered Ferdinand and ate him. The rat then burped up Ferdinand and his family's bones, and on Ferdinand's bone there was something wrong, indicating that Ferdinand had cancer and would've died the next day anyway. The rat then got cancer from Ferdinand, and it died. That is why Ferdinand was sad.

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The opposing forces behind all human beings is not light vs darkness, not good vs evil, but fear vs ' love. Whatever is overwhelmingly good for one person, is evil to many. Overwhelming darkness wont allow you to see. Overwhelming light will make you blind. You can never fear overwhelming love. You can never love overwhelming fear. These are the true polar opposites, part of all emotion that drive the human being.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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