roses are red, violets are blue, get on your knees ho, and stick to me like glue.

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why did the woman call the police? because there was a murderer pointing a gun at her at her son.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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How many pancakes does it take to make a dog house? Purple because, ice-cream has no bones.

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osama bin ladin is dead. let's get a beer.

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What do you get when you cross a train track and a bumpy feild, Further along on your GPS map.

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What did the dog say to the other dog? Were both dogs!

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What? Why?

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What's funny about a car accident involving three children, a widow, and a dog? Nothing.

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A black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving Their designated driver who they carefully selected as someone they thought had enough self-control to not drink and could get both of them home safely

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How are baseball and the holocaust similar? They're both games, except for the holocaust

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Think of a number between 0 and 2 That's how many times you're going to die in this life

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What's black and white and red all over? A racially integrated society.

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? -slavery

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Q:what's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat A:The wheel chair

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What advice did the cat give to the man? Nothing because it's a cat.

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Why didn't the cat eat its supper? It was dead.

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? he had no hands

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Q:what does jgjdhter hjldhgukrh mean A: it means something it is a real word

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When Glenn looks in the mirror all he sees is Nicole Sipes.

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How many blonds douse it take to change a light bulb I dont know it hasn't happened yet

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Who should you call when your dad overdoses on Viagra. Child Support

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Q. What is a deaf man's favorite song? A. Nothing, because he can not hear.

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call me if you want xxx on 0407777235

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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