How many dead babies can fit in the trunk of my car? Seven.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was the Islamic woman killed? She insulted Allah.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why are all the tech support people from India? That's where the majority of call centers are located.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A paraplegic women falls off a boat. Regardless of the fact that she was wearing a properly inflated flotation device, she still managed to drown. She died instantly, the next day.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Whats blue and white and red all over? The American flag

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did one traffic light say to the other? Nothing, as traffic lights are incapable of thought as they are not living.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the baseball coach say to his son? Nothing. He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I was walking down the street then my hands were itchy so I stuck em in my pockets Jk, I'm a donkey. We don't have hands

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock Knock *Opens door* Hi John, you got here right on time!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer was depressed about the low business and farmer's economy, so he poured gasoline all over himself and lit a match. The barn burned down and the chicken was the only survivor.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why was the kid sitting in a wooden chair? Because at the early age of four he was diagnosed with cancer and genital warts!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the arm-less Ben fall off the swing? Gravity

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a retarded black man? His name

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whats black and yellow a chinese with a bruise

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q:How meny jews can u fit in a mini? A:5 in the seats and 1 million in the ashtray.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worst then finding an worm in your apple. Finding a colony of flesh eating bugs after you toke a bite.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yo momma's so ugly. Most people do not enjoy looking at her

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whats worse than the holacost? your mom giving you cubes in your drink when you requested crushed instead

thumb_up thumb_down +8

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Sally." "Go away, Sally. I told you I am not interested." Kevin slammed the door on his colleague, as Sally proceeded to find somebody else and move on with her life. Kevin later in life became a drug addict, and got thrown in jail. Sally got married and had four kids, and while she feels bad for Kevin, she is happy with her life.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: What do is it called when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? A: Why give it a name when it is never goin to happen!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

So I was walking along the beach one day and I see this whale. Then this dolphin named Lennie came up and was like, "Hey whale, how've you been? I haven't seen you in a while." And the whale was like, "Sorry, but I can't talk to you." And Lennie was like, "Whyever not?" And the whale said, "Because I'm not a starfish!"

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops