How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They took away her Gameboy.

A blonde, a brunette and a red-head find a mirror with a message on it that says "Stand in front of the mirror and say something you think is true. If it is true, I'll grant you a wish. If it is wrong, you'll be sucked inside the mirror and be trapped there forever." The blonde, who is standing in front of the mirror, says "I think this is a stupid joke." and nothing happened.

If you are riding uphill in a canoe and the wheels fall off, how many pancakes does it take to fit in the dog house? None. Ice cream has no bones.

How many babiess it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

What would you do if I ripped your face off? Bleed to death.

Why did the black guy have a nice sterio? He has a well paying job and decided to treat himself.

Q:How do u kill a butcher A: Kill its family

yo moma is so poor she cant afford free samples

There once was a baby named Paul Bunyan who was as big as a house. His mother died at childbirth.

Why did the black men chase the chicken ? Because it wondered out of a barn.

a blind man drinking from a dog, thinking it was a fountain

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? ... Well, do you know or not?

i killed a blind guy when he wasnt looking

What did Batman tell Robin before he entered the batmobile? Robin, I had sex with your mother this last Thursday.

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

why is a peanut butter and jelly sandwich the same as a tub of fish? they are both food

What did the guy say to the campgrounds? It was in tents (get it like intense but it is a pun)

Knock Knock! Who's there? Your neighbor. Ok, Come in.

What did one dinosaure say to the other? Nothin, they are all dead. XD

Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant monkey

What do you get when you eat a bag of potatoes? The're all gone.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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