A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

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Why was the man sad? He was molested as a child.

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roses are red, violets are blue, im not going out with someone that belongs in a zoo.

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My grandpa died in the Holocaust He fell from the guard tower

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A man comes home to his wife sleeping with their neighbor. This lead to their divorce four months later.

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what did the ox say to his son when he left for collage? bison

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Q: why are you gay A: because your physically attracted to the same sex

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a woman gives birth at the hospital in china and then the doctor comes in and says doctor- i have good news and bad news for your baby mother-what is it doctor- bad or good mother-bad doctor-the bad news is that the baby is a girl and the good news is that your baby has cancer

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Stop procrastinating.

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What's black and can't speak? A garbage can.

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Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest? A: An investigator

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How many Jew can you fit in a car? As many as the car seats comfortably.

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What can I say, besides, the media is fighting one another now, people do have more freedom, religion is losing the grip on people, and yeah the world may be a bit grim right now, but people have chosen their own direction in life, and that is going wherever the most corrupt ones in society tell them to. And that was never different, I am not saying that you are not doing a good job, I am saying that the underground society failed, we where idealists, then we where branded criminals, without a shred of proof, I have not lost myself, and you have not lost you, why save the rest from what they enjoy?

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream? The Holocaust

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A middle aged bald man goes to Chuck E. Cheese with a hood and a lump in his back pocket. He has a somewhat enjoyable time with his offspring and leaves.

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A man stepped on a nail. He died shortly after of lockjaw.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm What is worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding chuck norris Whats worse than finding your girlfriend has a bigger Slong than you? Getting raped with a cheese grater. Whats worse than all of these? Being black Sadly im black :( -Jordan M

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Last week, I visited the Virgin Islands. Now it's just called Islands.

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Why did the boy drown? Because he was actually a brick. I lied about him being a boy.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? All of it.

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A white guy, a mexican, and a black guy are in a race. Who always wins? Whichever one crosses the finish line first

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Sometimes I wonder; why is that frisbee getting closer? Then it hits me. Someone just threw a frisbee at me.

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Did you hear about the man who swam to the bottom of the ocean? He drowned

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Your mama's so fat, that it's ruined her self-esteem.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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