How you know when dislextic

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go F*** yourself

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24

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save me from the nothing ive become

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a black man walks into a shop for an interview....everyone gets afraid and hides behind there desk..when the black man wonders why they are scarred he says "I'm here for the interview"...they all tell him to leave because on his resume he put his name as john...they thought he was white....

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arena football

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What did the cool guy say to Kelly Clarkson? Nothing, she's fat.

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Women's professional sports

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You are pretty bad emulations, first of all you should all swear and cuss a lot, that way you never get green thumbs and you all get minimal attention (negative attention) from people whose messages do not concern. I mean come on, if you are all different, you gotta admit that you are all good at typing like the very same person, its just that, none of them are good at sounding as the guy they are trying to emulate.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says "what is this, some kind of joke?!"

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What's worse than finding another worm in your apple? Another Holocaust

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Why was the black man in school detention? For sleeping in and showing up late accidently

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Why couldn't the baker get a new car? Because he lived in a recession and nobody was buying his cakes.

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Bigfoot, Santa, a dumb blonde, and a smart blonde all jump off of a cliff. They all reach terminal velocity and at impact at the same time. However, no one really cares.

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Q: What's multicoloured and spins around while screaming in agony? A: A clown in a washing machine.

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Why did the Muslim suicide bomber commit suicide? He was nervous and didn't think he could hijack a plane.

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why was 14 scared of 15? 7-8-9

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AIDS

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Why did the Egg turn Purple Because it didnt turn blue.

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Person 1: *sneeze Person 2: bless you Person 1: I'm jewish. They never spoke again.

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New groundbreaking research has just revealed today that a complex sentence can be used to manipulate the human mind, so in this sentence somewhere is a psychological amemphism that subconsciously hypnotises the mind into doing something within the next five seconds, and if you read this sentence over and over again, you might just spot it!

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A ninja walked into a dojo and was kindly greeted by his master.

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What does a homeless man get for his birthday? 25 cents

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A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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