Why did the man ask his wife to make him a sandwich? He lost both of his arms in the war.

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what did the boy in the blue hat do? wear his blue hat

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how do women get from the kitchen to the bedroom? they walk there.

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In Soviet Russia, millions die under an oppressive and uncaring regime that uses communism to justify its inhumane policies.

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What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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why did the girl cry while watching starwars? She was being raped

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how do you get a girl of a swing? puch her off! how do you get her friend of a swing? throw a refridgerator at her!

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What do you call a fat man who can turn slim? I don't know

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Why could the kid not finish his homework? Because it flew out the window on the way to his parents funeral

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What is white and long? A New York winter

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But one McDonalds Happy Meal for the price of two, and receive another McDonalds Happy meal absolutley free!

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an dislexik nam rwote hits

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there is 500 dicks on the wall how many will choke on? None?? so ur a professional!!!! lol

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot was a potato.

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How can you tell a baby lost it's voice? It doesn't scream when you staple it to a ceiling fan and turn it on.

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Why could'nt the Jew drink milk? He was laptose intolerant.

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69 HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *goes crazy and shoots himself*

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What does Obama, the President of the United States of America see when he closes his eyes? His eyelids

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

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Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Why does Santa Clause say Ho Ho Ho? He has Tuberculosis.

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How did the blonde die drinking milk? She was severely lactose intolerant.

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just a man and his thoughts....and a smart phone app, and a loving family, thats not the point.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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