Two twins are born only a minute apart. There is a mistake at the hospital and they are seperated. Years later they reconnect on Oprah and realize they do not have much in common.

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What did the comedian tell the audience? A well thought out joke that anyone can relate to because that is what the point of a joke is.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like you Get in the van

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What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

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How do you sabotage someone's car? Drop a fridge on it

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What did the black man say to the mexican? Hello

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Q. what's red and smells like blue paint A. a dead baby in a trash can beside a foster home

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What is worse then falling into a lava pit? Nothing you idiot.

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Hey, Batman Yeah? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents!

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What do you call a smart blond? There aren't any so there shouldn't be a name for it.

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How did the lawyer survive the airplane crash? He didn't.

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Helen Keller went to town riding on a pony she stuck a feather in her hat and called it uuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

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What do you call something that lives in a pineapple under the sea? I don't know, but that seems like an improbable circumstance.

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How many pieces of toast can you eat in 1 year? well, it depends on how many pieces you eat in one day, does it count snacks, or full meals of just toast, can you eat even when your not hungary, if you throw up does it still count? If it is 1 piece a day, it would be 365.

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what do you get when you give an eevee a french stone? Napoleon!!!

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A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

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Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting anally raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

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Hey girl, are you from Jamaica? Cus ja makin me go temporarily insane.

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Why did the woman accuse a black man of stealing from a bank? Because she was eating a cornmuffin on the bench across the street when she saw a black man,stealing money from a bank

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Person 1: Knock Knock Person 1: Who's there Person 1: me me you who you me you who me you no me (say super dooper quickly)

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Once upon a time, A lonely man was living in the woods. He died of exhaustion, dehydration, starvation, and bacterial infection. The end. Once upon a time, Another lonely man was living in the woods. He built a house, made a well, made a farm, got married, had kids, and had a wonderful life. The end.

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What's the deal with airplane food? I've never tried it. I'm just curious how it was.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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