"Honey im home!" but his honey was dead on the floor along with his 3 kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

There were two smokestacks, a little one and a big one. One day, the little one said to the big one, "I'm tired of being the lesser of two smokestacks!"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's funny about anti-jokes? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q:What do you call an insecure person A:Somebody who is likely to commit suicide

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did little Susie give to young Billy on Christmas? Genital Herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Abbie shaved her arse today....then it smiled at me

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A Cheerio is at Cheerio high school, and there is another Cheerio that he wants to ask to the prom, but she is a frosted Cheerio and because of Cheerio social statuses she would not go with him. So he goes to the Cheerio factory so he can become a frosted Cheerio. The factory workers tell him that he can be a frosted Cheerio, but the machines are malfunctioning today and they can only frost half of him. He agrees, and the girl Cheerio goes to the prom with him. He shows up at the prom with her, and she asks him to get her some punch. So, he's walking around, looking for the punch line, when he realizes: There isn't any.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man on a plane convened his stupid flyer that instead of who in knock-knock jokes it what were, he thought it would funny. Later it really paid off, as they fly very close over water he says "knock knock" "whose there" " Captain Neverlands" "Captain Neverlands wh-...were" "Captain Neverlands IN WATER YOU DUMMY!!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

whats worse than finding a worm in apple? being chased by retards

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves? Reeves Christopher

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your mother getting raped by your sister.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Female Orgasms

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did michael jackson wear white gloves around young boys? His doctor recommended that he do so due to bad circulation.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk and leave. 2 hours later there's a newscast about two drunken men who died in a car accident. It wasn't them, the newscast about them came shortly after

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the boy with arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why can't George Washington sit up straight? He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats the difference between a black man and a banana? Banana's don't hijack planes.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

this is just a tribute to the greatest anti-joke ever told as I can't quite remember how it went, but you gotta beleive me, you just had to be there, it's a matter of opinion.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Is this the Krusty Krab? Actually it is,how may i help you?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: What's the difference between Catholism and Judiasm? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Hhahahahahhahhahahahahhaahhayournanisdeadhahhahahahahahahah

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's fun and challenging? Writing an anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I haven't had sex for about 2 years, 10 months, 20 days and 4 minutes. It doesn't bother me though.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops