What did the lady say after she returned home from the grocery store? "Oh no! I forgot the milk!"

why did the irishman, the englishman and the african man die? because i went on a violent killing spree, murdering everyone i saw

A man goes into a bar and gets drunk. He realizes that he is too drunk to drive and calls a cab to bring him home.

Homeless man....it's what's for dinner!

A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some Chap-stick, and put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because, as all people know, Ducks cannot speak. However, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting a prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chap-stick anyway, since he has no lips.

Why didn't the baby learn to walk? It got hit by a car.

You mothers so ghetto, you died.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she couldn't afford one.

ejaculation JLR

Q: Why does the chicken cross the road? A: To get hit by a redneck.

An man walked into a bar. Unbeknownst to him, the bar happened to be a having a Rave party. The man, having epilepsy, proceeded to have a seizure. Luckily, a paramedic was there and saved his life.

Why did they call the woman crazy? because she drowned her children in a lake.

Q: Why did the little boy who just got over a terrible sore throat fall down the stairs? A: His legs were brutally torn off by wolves.

Roses are black Violets are too I am a dog I don't know how to rhyme

Doctor Doctor! I think i'm epileptic! I'm not the Doctor, I'm the receptionist. You're a hypochondriac, now wait in the Que, like everybody else Mrs. Davis.

Why did the man punch the women? I don't know, but he served jailtime

A man walked into a bar, He then realised that he was likely to become the butt of a joke quite soon and subsequently left to take his kids to the park.

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? were both lawyer's.

To be, or not to be. That is not the question. The question is, what time is it?

Yo mamas so fat that when a bus hit her she said " who threw that pebble at me"

Jayden Eccles

What did the boy with no mom get for Christmas? He was beaten by his drunken and abusive father.

yo mama so stupid, she went to the super bowl an bought a spoon

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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