Why does a man wake up every morning to do the same job over again? Because, wait... what the heck kind of a question is that?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What happens when a right turn is finally made in NASCAR? The driver has successfully changed his tires and has been refueled, now he is pulling out of pit lane.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was the boy sad? Because his dad was a serious alcoholic who refused to go to rehab. Being an alcoholic constantly led to him beating the boy and his mother. Eventually, the boy couldn't handle this anymore, and he committed suicide. Realizing what he had done, the father also committed suicide. The mother is now locked away in a mental hospital, for she couldn't hold grasp of the deaths of her husband, and her son.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

There was a young boy walking to school. and he found a red hairbrush on the ground. He then proceeded to walk to school. During lunch he examined the haircrush and it looked perfectly normal. A few days later, he decided he was bored with the hairbrush and decided to place it in a tree. A girl found the hairbrush. The end. You just wasted 30 seconds of your life. Ha.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Nicole: Shove it where the sun don't shine! Katlyn: I'm richer than you! Nicole: Shut your frickin' mouth! Katlyn: You'll be bankrupt! (This conversation was recorded while Nicole and Katlyn were playing Monopoly. They both died in a car accident later that day...)

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Knock Knock. Who's there? An astronaut. He's all alone in the vacuum of space. No one hears him knocking.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Guess what sucks! A Vaccume. Guess what blows! A Sucky Vaccume.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Youre mom is so dead...

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a joke with no punchline?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the elephant paint his toenails orange? Because he wanted to hide in the pumpkin patch

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q. Whats red and smells like blue paint? A. Wheres my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did Lebron go to Miami? Because Chuck Norris told him to.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

dyslexics of the world untie!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why did the chicken cross the road? to prove he could. Did it workout? NO

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why can't white kids say the "F" word? Because they'll get soap in their mouths Why can't black kids say the "F" word? Because they'll get a beating until their butts turn black and blue and they'll start crying in pain

thumb_up thumb_down -17

There are 2 men are standing on the roof of a building, one of them jumps off, the other one is named Peter

thumb_up thumb_down -17

I DO NOT CARE ABOUT NOVA! MY NAME IS VIKTOR REZNOV! AND I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats worse then getting shot in the leg? Getting shot twice in the leg

thumb_up thumb_down -17

chuck norris's daughter lost her virginity but he got it back

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was the black man in Jail? He works there as a correctional officer.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are red Violets are blue I like peanut butter Can you fly?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a group of black guys riding on horseback? You don't. You call the cops first.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Unless this event results in you being a vegetable.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops