What happened to the guy who dropped his soap in the prison shower? His friend picked it up for him.

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Alright alright Tifa, you look totally different from your drawn identical twin. And yeah I could have been a bit more subtle, don't you worry, I have a special knack for SPAMMING COMMENTS INTO THE ABYSS! I mean sheesh you where pretty open about it earlier, and you said you did not give a damn about what random people thought... Moral: But yeah, I can do better than that, I just do not want to, no seriously, if you are going to go feeling ashamed, then I have failed you.

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Why did Moses part the sea Because it was divisible by 2

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In Soviet Russia You drive car, because a car driving you would be screwed up

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How do you pick up girls in Auschwitz? With a dustpan

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A man walked into a pole barn oh wait I meant a pole bar so it actually hurt.

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SQUID DOMINATION!!! Squids WILL Take Over the World!!!

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Q: what did i say when i crashed into the twin tower. A: nothing i was dead

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sharks

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Womens basketball

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Why was David sad? Because he got his head stuck in a window.

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If Oscar Meyer had a dog, what breed would it be? A golden retriever.

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Mitt Romney

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What do you call a black flying an airplane? A pilot you racist bastard.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Jeff. I don't know anyone by the name of Jeff. Please leave my property immedaitely.

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What did the anorexic girl say to the skilled psychologist? Fuck off you'll never understand me.

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A black guy and a white guy jump out of a tree, who hits the ground first? They both hit at the same time while sustaining minor injuries.

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How you know that you are flying with a "no frills" airline? There are no meals or films provided, no orange juice to drink during ascent and descent and no mid-flight shop service.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? (No answer)

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Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

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"This is Jesus Christ to Tim Tebow. Please leave me alone. Don't you know that my day off, is Sunday?"

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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As a stand-up comedian, I've been really interested in how comedians have recovered from jokes not hitting making fun of the fact. Recently, I was in a situation where a rhetorical question didn't hit, and anti-joking (lamenting on the lack of a punchline sarcastically) ended up generating the laugh I needed to move on! Hurray for Anti-jokes! Me: You know the gym Extreme Fitness? Audience: SILENCE Me: (sarcastically) Yes, exactly. That's exactly how that interaction went in my mind when I was practising at home. I ask question - audience responds euphorically - I continue with my joke... http://michaeljagdeo.wordpress.com/2012/01/29/anti-jokes-how-to-recover-when-a-joke-doesnt-hit/

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Why was the turkey killed? Because this particular turkey lived on a farm and a supermarket was paying the farmer a reasonable price to sell it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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