A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why the monkey fall out the tree? Cause he was dead!

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Roses are red, violets are blue, whoever met you is a BIG fool

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One time I walked into a fat kid..

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Why did the black homeowner declare bankruptcy on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by continuing to pay his mortgage bills.

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Roses are red Violets are red Your flowers are red Yes set your garden on fire

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If it bothers you? I am just saying that, fucking alright ill be slightly less cruel, I mean come on! It does not matter shit what others think! If someone ever tries to assault you because you are associated with me (yeah it happens), I will stand in front of you and KILL (and possibly rape) THEM!

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What did the platypus do whenever he walked into the bar? Nothing. It's a platypus, they don't do much.

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69

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you know whats worse than being cold? being colder

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Hey did you see Helen Keller's dress? No, she's dead.

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The girl was really drunk and passed out. She woke up the next day with a hangover.

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Internet Explorer

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Two people are sitting on a 10th story window sill. They both fall off and die.

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A- knock knock B- whose there? A- Chuck Norris B- chuck norris who? A- are you retarded?

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Decode this; Hetay owcay aidsay oomay. Answer: ummmmm.... Let me think....ummm, does anybody speak pig latin?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He never did because he's in KFC

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Q. How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? A. That obviously depends on the size of the bathtub and each individual infant.

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racism...deal with it!

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what did the duck say to the monkey.............. QUACK!!!!!!!!

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Cameron is a r e t a r d

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why did the man take a poo because his rectum exploded

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How did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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