Whats the hardest thing to have sex with? a goldfish.

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Why did rachels computer break ? Because she was using it in the road and got hit by a bus

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam...

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one underneath it. What's worse than that? It has to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It goes back for seconds.

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id give my right arm to be ambidextrous

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Whats black and red and dead? Nobody could tell, but they were sure that it wasn't a dead black person, so stop being racist!

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Q: What's funnier than Women's Rights? A: Nothing.

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everybody loves raymond

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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what is the biggest lie I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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What do you call a black pope? Catholic.

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Im Harold Camping.... and i enjoy scaring the shit out of you

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What's worst than your favorite football team losing the football? Giving birth to a stillborn child.

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What is Lady Gaga's real name? Who the crap knows?

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what leaves a bigger memory than a passionate kiss? A STAB WOUND!

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Do you work at subway? Because you are giving me a footlong. Yes, please, on white bread, with turkey, ham, white cheddar, and all of the vegetables. Maybe a little bit of sweet onion sauce and sub sauce. Sure, that will be a combo with chips. Thank you very much.

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Hey, Max!!

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What do black people eat? Food.

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A deaf man walks into a bar. Minutes later, cops come in and arrests the poor man for not paying his bill while the deaf man sits at the bar calmly drinks his beer.

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Why was the chicken afaid to cross the road? because there was no road.

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On her day off, a fully clothed stripper walks into a bar she's never been to before. The regulars turn their heads to see who has just walked in, then turn back to their own conversations.

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Q: Whats black white and red all over? A: A dead penguin

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What did the taxi driver say to the chicken when the chicken called a cab? "aren't you supposed to be crossing a road somewhere?" Little did the taxi driver know that the chickens license was taken away for multiple DUIs because when his wife left him he became an alcoholic mess, lost his job and became depressed. But when he called the taxi, he was on his way to a job interview. Since he never made it to his job interview he soon went broke and lost his home. Having hit rock bottom, the chicken unawarely started to cross a busy road and was ran over by that same taxi driver.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops