Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! :)

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Man: You know what sucks? Other man: What? Man: Diarrhea... Know what's worse? Other man: No, what? Man: The smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: why did everyone on the ship drown? A: Because the ship sunk

thumb_up thumb_down +13

"Knock Knock" "You know the doorbell is working?" "Oh, well, you know I'm here now. May I come in?" "Yes, have a cup of tea"

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Your so ugly that your birth certeficate is a apology letter from the condum factory

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did batman say to robin when they got to their car? Get in the car

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A homeless man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What will it be?" The homeless man says, "Nothing. I have no money."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What happened when the turkey jumped out of the airplane? It fell.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

David Cameron

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was the little boy sad? Because his dog died

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the little boy lose his fingers? He was left unattended with a chain saw.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what did the dead cat say to the dead dog? Nothing, they're dead

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the squirrel fall out of a tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of a tree? It was cruelly stapled to the first one.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A man comes home to his wife sleeping with their neighbor. This lead to their divorce four months later.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Andy: Mom, I wish I was a dinosaur. Mom: Aw, that's cute! Why? Andy: Because dinosaurs do not suffer from terminal pancreatic cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

whats it called when you see a ton of white people running down a hill.... an avalanch whats it called when you see a ton of black people running down a hill.....a mud slide whats it called when you see a ton of mexicans running down a hill............ a jail break

thumb_up thumb_down +11

there was a black man his head looked like a peanut

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why are a black man's eyes always bloodshot red after having sex? Pepper spray.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

knock knock go away!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A guy walks in to a bar and says to the bartender "I'm fed up with all these 'guy walks into a bar' jokes on anti-joke. The bartender says "I have no idea what you're talking about".

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did Obama give a speech? Because he is the president and people look up to him

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why is motorboating so much fun? Because they are unmatched for their speed and agility in the water.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do 2 arabs say to each other in a super-market? For those of you who don't know your history, the true Lebanese are Phonecians. As such, they are not Ishmaelites/Arabs. They are from the house of Jaffeth. the youngest of Noah's sons. Arabs are from the house of Shem (i.e., Shemites/Semites), the oldest of Noah's sons, and Hamm, Noah's middle son who fathered Cannah with his mother. Haggar, the woman with whom Abraham fathered Ishmael, was a Cannonite. As such, Ishmael, the father of the Arabs, is half Semetic and half Hammetic. The true Lebanese are neither. Furthermore, the first non-Jewish Christian church was established with the Gentiles (the children of Jaffeth) in Lebanon. And then the shop blew up.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops