Why did Jane's parachute not open? Because a plane hit her on the way down.

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What did the cop say to the people watching the house fire? All right nothing to see here jokes over

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A1: he was shot. A2: he died A3: the forest was being cut down and he got into a machine and was shredded to pieces A4: he fell asleep

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women's rights

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Q: Whats worse than Coke A: Diet Coke

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Knock Knock! FUUCKKKK OFFFFFFFF

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Brett Favre sent me a pic of his penis. I then compared it to my own and felt good about my general ackage size

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what does mandy enjoy on weekends a load of cum in her face

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how did the man with just a head hide the fact that he murdered someone? im not sure but this seems highly untrue as someone could not kill someone with just their head.

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This is a shovels and rakes conversation. No hoes allowed.

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Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

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The awkward moment when you don't know whether to like or dislike this because you think I want like so you are gonna dislike but what If I want dislikes, but what if I want likes, you are confused Antijokeception....

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky, It hit one of the random green pipes.

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3 strangers were locked in a dark room they turned the light on, unlocked the door and proceeded with their day.

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Homeless man....it's what's for dinner!

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What did one umbrella say to the other umbrella? Nothing, umbrellas cannot instigate a conversation, because they cannot talk.

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when Life gives you lemons, make lemonade. So i made some lemonade. Turns out the lemons Kawazaki Life gave me were poisoned and i shortly die afterwards. i wouldve died cursing out her name but she was cute so i forgave her in my mind. and thus i die in peace.

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Who told the gorilla he couldn't go to the ballet? The people who were in charge of making that decision.

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What do you call a limbless woman on a beach? Sandy

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I regret everything.....

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your moms so fat that she had to buy bigger cloths, her husband left her, she became a druggie and died alone.

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What did the boy ask the ice cream man? Can I have some ice cream?

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What happened when my familys break on the car didn't work? They rolled down a hill and fell off a cliff and died. I loved them.

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An innocent man's home was raided by police, who accused him of grand theft auto. It turns out it was just a case of mistaken identity.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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