A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

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My love life

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Q: why are you gay A: because your physically attracted to the same sex

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A man loses his wife in a car accident He then fall into a deep depression then hangs himself.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because crossing through traffic is very dangerous

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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whats wrose than slipping on a banana? Getting Shot in the face.

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What did the dog say to the house? Roof

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Why is it wrong to love your neighbour? You would be loving a dickhead.

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how do you get rid of your home work? give it to your dog!

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A bar walks into a man. No, firstly it wasn't a man and secondly the bar didn't walk in. The pedophile just slid it in and sodomized the poor boy.

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What do you call a fucking idiotic douchebag with ebola? An ebloa paitent

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what do JFK, plato, and a dead penguin have in common? theyre all dead.

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What's the difference between a leopard and a coffee table? There is no difference. They both have four legs.

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Q: Suzy loves apples she will o anything to get her hands on an apple. A: You guys are so gullible!!! She DID eat Tom's apple. ...... then he killed her.

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Why couldn't Little Johnny read his 3rd grade novel? His was repeatedly stabbed in his eyes.

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This sentence is a lie.

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What's worse than chicken pox? AIDs.

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Whats worse than seeing your family killed in front of your eyes? Not much to be honest

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What smells like death and makes kids cry? Dead animal

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Knock Knock Who is there? The IRS coming to take your house

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Whats worse than 10 dead babies in the street? 11 babies in the street.

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What's better than eating an orange? Anal sex with Kim Kardashian.

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Juan got hit by a truck Knock Knock Who's there? Juan's brother coming to stab you in the abdomen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops