What did the bird say when he was riding the turtle? Weeee...

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A pirate walks out of a bar. He drowns in a puddle.

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Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth she has lacked a jaw

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Roses are red, Violets are red, My house is red, I am on fire

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What did the guy say before he learned how to Dougie? Teach me how to Dougie

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why did the little boy cross the road? because he had been raped.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven liked to eat numbers lower than itself.

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Theres an irishman , scottish man and a welsh man on a plane they where going to france

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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud, and cross back again? Because he was a dirty double crosser

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If a blonde and a brunette are both falling out of a building, which one will hit the ground first? The brunette, she jumped first.

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A girl hears a noise in the middle of the night in her kitchen downstairs. She walks down halfway through the staircase and asks if anyone is there, as if the intruder will say, "Yes, I'm in the kitchen. Want me to make you a sandwich?" *This will never happen. Movies are stupid when it comes to these scenes. No one will actually ask if anybody is there if they hear a noise in the middle of the night.*

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What did the black guy get on the SATs? Who knows, that isn't a specific person

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what do you call a jew hanging from a tree? dead

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What did the Shark attack victim say just before she died from her injuries? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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what do you call a prostitute with white eyes? emma , with the cloudy iris,

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Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

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What's the difference between a hipster and a steaming pile of shit? Many things.

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Why did the tornado cross the road? Cuz it's a tornado. Don't question it. Run.

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I'm at a payphone. Though I'm out of change so I'm unable to call my girlfriend and break up with her.

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Rim Ram Ree, Kick him in the knee, Rim Ram Rass, Kick him in the other knee

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What did the KKK member say to the african american man. Nothing, he just killed him.

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What is black, white, and red all over A penguin in a blender

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what did the blond do after she turned 18? Reelected Obama.

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Why does a man wake up every morning to do the same job over again? Because, wait... what the heck kind of a question is that?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops