Women don't need an education. The only book they need is a recipe book.

Why did the dead baby cross the road? It didn't. It's dead.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs falling skydiving? Jon, because that's his name.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a free-range chicken

Q: Why are asians good at math? A: Because they study with their tutor every tuesday

So there is two clowns. Pickle and Jim. If you were asked who was funnier, you would probably say pickle. Well you would be wrong. It's Jim.

whats worse then finding a worn in your apple the holocaust whats worse then the holocaust two worms in your apple

what is very tall and red a very tall red building

Why was little Jessica missing?? She was stuck in the freezer.

A kid walked into a bar and ordered a drink and then was arrested for drinking under the age of 18

there was a guy who wanted to be bad and have bitches but he died from all the smoking and drinking and went to hell for eternal damnation

Why were the Jews stuck in Germany? Because Joseph Rosenstein and his Jewish family missed their train out of Frankfurt to go to Paris, and so they had to stay another night in their hotel.

Why did Lisa spill her drink? Her plane crashed.

There were three men standing outside. They were enjoying the nice weather.

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

So, a boy walks into a baker's shop and asks for a loaf of bread. The man says "do you want white or brown?" The boy says "oh, I don't mind, I've got my bike outside."

Knock Knock Who's there? Yes.

What do you get when you cross a chicken with a road? To get to the other side.

Why did the Japanese piliot crash into the ship? Because he has motion sickness and puked all over the wind shield making it so he can't see.

c:

Why are tests such a pain in the ass? Because your vomiting shit you'd learned the night before.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing Jenga on September 11th.

What do you get when you mix a burrito and an earthworm? Diaherea

Knock Knock The homeowner's acquaintance had called him just minutes prior because he had forgotten something at his house. With this having occurred, the homeowner had a strong sense of who was at the door. Being a cautious person however, he checked his prediction by examining the man through the door's peephole. Having asserted that it was what he had in mind, the homeowner opened the door and handed him some papers that were of importance to the acquaintance.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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