Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A man walks into a bar, and says to the bartender, "Do you know where the library is located?" The bartender describes to him that the closest library is three blocks down, next to the red brick building with a green roof.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Many people believe that dogs are mammals. They're right

thumb_up thumb_down -26

There once was a man from Nantucket. He had no distinguishing characteristics whatsoever.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family...

thumb_up thumb_down -26

you were so loud you woke helen keller up!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Yo mama soooooo dumb! You should really take her to a doctor, she might actually suffer from mental retardation, I'm just concerned about her.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Please give money to a local Jew we have had such a bad time please ONLY people who are Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A guy walks into a bar. But it was a solid steel bar and suffered severe wounds and a concussion. Lucky for him a bystander saw this happen and called 911. The man was transported to a hospital where he eventually made a full recovery and returned to work after one year.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

An Irishman walks out of a pub. Just kidding.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's black, white, and red all over? Trayvon Martin and George Zimmerman.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long mane?"

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's worst than finding a repeated joke on anti-joke? Finding a grammatical error on anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why was Susie crying? There was a frog stapled to her face.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

You know your in deep shit when you hit somebody in the head with a 2 by 4 and they dont go down.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

who let the dogs out my mom because they're fat and need exercise

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the Dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo. Cow says moo.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Whats white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Is it a bird, is it a plane?! No it's.... It's a bird.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A middle aged man goes to a psychic. She tells him that he has prostate cancer, and his wife has been cheating on him for the past 3 years.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is notified, and the duck is released into a nearby park.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops